Friday, December 31, 2010

The Baby Killer's Final Post ov 2010

My New Year's resolution: don't use the "ov" joke anymore. At least until this time next year...

Before the festivities get underway and I get so high and/or drunk that I can't really do anything that requires significant hand-eye coordination, I wanted to take the time to thank Mosh Rebellion and all the readers for this awesome experience. These past few months have been a blast, and we're just getting started, we have big plans for this little shindig. But remember we can't do it without you guys, so make sure you keep coming back. Read the articles, comment on them, shoot us an e-mail, and spread the word about us. Just keep contributing, we can only get so far on our own. And most important, keep the rebellion alive. Go to shows, get real pits going, and if any dancers show up looking to ruin everyone else's fun, fucking bring the hammer down on those bitches and take the pit back. We can do it, I witnessed it firsthand at the Suffocation show back in November, and if we continue to stand our ground we will prevail, I guarantee it. Circle pits, not karate kicks! See you in 2011, you sick fucks.

Love always,
-The Baby Killer

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Mosh Rebellion's Top Albums of 2010... Will Have to Wait Until 2011

I have been very busy lately, so sadly I won't be able to compile a best-of list for 2010 quite yet. However, I will have another list hopefully written within the next two weeks. What is this list you ask? Well, I used to be ridiculously addicted to downloading albums, so much so that I had over seven days worth of new music in my "New Stuff" folder. I realized my problem recently, and vowed to listen to every single album in this playlist before I got any other music, so I've been busy wading through hours and hours of different releases, some good and some bad. However, once I'm done listening to all this music, I will document my favorite picks for your enjoyment.

It should be an interesting article, full of plenty of metal and non-metal picks. Look for it in the near future... hopefully.

The Baby Killer's Top Picks ov 2010

Well folks, 2010 is rapidly drawing to a close, which means it's time to do the obligatory "best of" countdowns. However, it's difficult to label bands, albums and songs as the "best" of anything, because it all comes down to personal taste and the mood you're in. As such, I thought it would be more prudent to just compile a list of some of the releases that I particularly enjoyed this year, albums and EP's that I wouldn't necessarily put above everything else but were noteworthy and stood out. In essence I guess it's pretty much the same thing, but whatever. The compilation in question is as follows.

Defeated Sanity- Chapters of Repugnance

A lot of people might not think that slam could be tech, but those people haven't heard Germany's Defeated Sanity, and those people are missing out. Chock full of crushing riffs, spastic tempo and meter changes, jazzy drums and skull-caving slams, this album is a must-have for any brutal death fan. When it was first released, Willowtip Records marketed it as the single heaviest release of 2010, and after being subjected to the aural assault of songs like "Consumed By Repugnance", "Coerced Into Idolatry" and "Blissfully Exsanguinated", most people would be hard-pressed to disagree. The music is all over the place to be certain, but the members are all perfectly in sync with each other. Tech death naysayers may complain about the album's nonstop complexity, even going so far as to call it soulless and pretentious, but more often than not the people who say that are the elitist kvlt dumbasses who think Gorgoroth are the peak of musical prowess, so fuck them. As far as I'm concerned, Chapters of Repugnance is a landmark achievement, and not just for Defeated Sanity but for all death metal.

Circle of Dead Children- Psalm of the Grand Destroyer

After a brief hiatus, the underground deathgrind champions have returned with some of their best work to date. This album offers fifteen tracks of sheer insanity that easily stand up to CODC's earlier works, which is fitting since one of the songs is a re-recording of "Ursa Major", the opening track of their notorious first album Starving the Vultures. All of the elements the band is known for- grating guitar tones, spastic yet precise drumming, well-written abstract lyrical concepts, and vocalist Joe Horvath's ability to apparently do every vocal style known to man- are on display here, but never have they all come together so clearly and cleanly. Tracks like "Avatar of Innocence", "We Who Move with the Graven Worm" and "Refuse To Kill the Same Way Twice" will undoubtedly leave those with weak constitutions pulverized, deliriously asking if anyone got the plates on that truck. It's not for everyone, but if you can get past the grating atonality then Psalm of the Grand Destroyer will thoroughly satisfy your deathgrind appetite.

Misery Index- Heirs To Thievery

If you're looking for something to really get your head a-bangin', look no further than Misery Index's latest offering. Since this band is essentially the bastard child of Dying Fetus, it's fitting that every one of this album's eleven tracks are jam-packed with ferocious grooves that are guaranteed to get your head bobbing. For me, listening to songs like "The Carrion Call" and "The Illuminaught" is like eating potato chips- I can't do it just once, I have to keep doing it until I hate myself for it. Another highlight of Heirs To Thievery is its thought-provoking lyrics. Now, Misery Index has always had well-written anti-establishment lyrics, but I found them to be particularly pertinent to our generation on this album, most noticeably in the song "Plague of Objects", which calls out modern society's borderline parasitic dependence on the Internet (says the guy who regularly forgoes hanging out with his friends to write on a blog). Prime example: "Feeding online, absent of mind, a chorus of billions thrive", and "Troll and evade, lurk and persuade, the worst you'll find's an Error 404". Think about that the next time you're pwning n00bz or whatever the hell it is you gamers do, and go listen to this album while you're at it.

Woe of Tyrants- Threnody

Christian melodic death metal? I'd never heard of it either, but here we are, and wouldn't you know it, they're awesome. This is the third full length from this Ohio quintet, who wasted no time after last year's Kingdom of Might and expanded on their signature quality songwriting. This time around they've added a touch of keyboards to the mix, and not in a flashy, cheesy way a la Dragonforce, but rather as a simple and subtle way to compliment the guitar melodies, and it works beautifully. As with the last album, the music is powerful and has an almost triumphant feel to it, like the band made it through a long and arduous journey just before writing the songs. Maybe that's the religious overtones shining through, but whatever it is it gives the band a very unique sound that puts them at the head of the pack in their genre. Listen to the tasteful use of fret tapping in the song "Bloodsmear" and you'll see what I'm talking about. Mark my words, if Woe of Tyrants can keep this up, they're going places.

Intestinal Alien Reflux- Illegal Aliens

Now what kind of Baby Killer list would this be if it didn't have at least one good slam band? This two man death machine got my attention with their 2008 full length Exogenocide, but this album is where they truly came into their own. The production is crystal clear, the riffs are killer, and the slams are brutal to say the least. What more could you want? These Lansing, Michigan brothers are seriously underrated and deserve much more widespread attention than they're given, but then again this is slam we're talking about, so that may be wishful thinking. In any case, Illegal Aliens is not only brutal, but also a bit of a step into new lyrical territory for the band. There is plenty of gore to go around with songs like "Gurgling Vaginal Discharge" and a re-recording of "Blood Semen Orgasm", as well as tongue-in-cheek humor (watch out, he's got his probe!), but the guys also seem to have taken a bit of a political stance on this record, particularly on the subject of drugs. Songs like "Republicant", "Demacraddict" and "Drugs On War" demonstrate a clear distaste for America's drug policies (not surprising, I'm pretty sure they're both total stoners), and while this doesn't really mean too much musically, it is nice to see a slam band thinking outside the box a little bit for a change. Good on ya, guys.

Decrepit Birth- Polarity

Speaking of drugs, let's talk about Decrepit Birth. The metal community eagerly awaited the release of their followup to 2008's Diminishing Between Worlds, and to say they exceeded expectations is a gross understatement. Polarity is everything that was good about both of the band's previous albums, from the melody and technicality of their last album to the straight up brutality of And Time Begins. Matt Sotelo's expertly-composed riffs, leads and harmonies sound just as amazing as ever, KC Howard managed to lay down some of his best drumming to date on the album before leaving the band, and Bill Robinson's unique growls tell stories of space, time and the ethereal that will make you look up at the sky and wonder. Of course we all know the reason why Decrepit Birth is so damn good is because they smoke shit that would kill us mere mortals on a daily basis, but hey, whatever gets the job done. And oddly enough this is one of my favorite albums to put on when I spark up, so it all works out nicely.

Cerebral Bore- Maniacal Miscreation

In case you guys haven't realized by now, I really, really, REALLY like Cerebral Bore. I was super excited to hear that they'd signed with Earache Records, but that was well after they'd put out this monster of an album. These Scotts are proof that you don't need to play solos to be one of the best tech death bands out there; all you need are killer riffs, greased-lightning drums and a smoking hot Dutch girl on vocals. Throw in a slam or two to keep things grounded and you're good to go. You can tell by listening to the music that this is a band that truly loves what they are doing, and now that they're signed to a respectable label they have the means to keep doing it. I'm expecting big things from you Cerebral Bore, big things!

Magrudergrind- Crusher

I have a specific reason for why Magrudergrind's new EP is the last entry on my year-end list, and it actually doesn't have much to do with the music itself. It's very good, don't get me wrong, but it's really nothing special, just your typical good grindcore, as we've come to expect from them. No, the reason Crusher makes the list is because Scion sponsored and endorsed it. Many people gave Magrudergrind a lot of grief for this, saying that they were selling out and what have you; after all, grindcore is pretty much as underground as it gets, so it's understandable that there would be a huge amount of hesitation when a major company showed interest in it. Luckily for us, Magrudergrind didn't sell out at all. The new EP is just as good as anything they've put out before, and rather than using the music as a gimmick to make more money, Scion gave Magrudergrind the means to potentially reach out to more people that they wouldn't have been able to reach without Scion's help. Basically, Crusher is worth mentioning because it's impressive to see such an extreme genre getting mainstream attention without softening up.

There was plenty more cool shit this year in metal, but it's late, so I think I'll leave it at that. Let us know your favorite releases from 2010 in the comments, and here's to another year of rebellion.


Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Video You WIll Hate the Most of the Day: 12/29/10


So much rage...

I would love to annotate this video but it's not even worth it. Just watch. Maybe the Baby Killer and I will watch this documentary one day, narrate it, and post it for your enjoyment.

Fuck this.

Friday, December 24, 2010

End of the Week: Happy Holidays!

Holy shit, it's already Christmas Eve... fuck. As such, sorry about not getting much done this week, I'm sure you all know how hectic Christmas shopping can be. But rest assured, we're not a bunch of lazy asses like Metalsucks and Metal Injection, we're not slacking on the blogging to take a vacation, more shit will follow next week. For those of you who weren't paying attention this week, we did two things:

-We reviewed a cool Job For a Cowboy show

-We also gave you a taste of the deathgrind supergroup Murder Construct

I'm ashamed of myself to say that that's all, and since we didn't get a chance to get any Shit Hardcore Kids Wish They Could Play or Slam Spotlight segments in, I think I'll take this time to show y'all some of the stuff I've been slaying lesser mortals to over the past week or so, including a couple mandatory Xmas jams.

Squash Bowels- "Grindvirus"

If you're looking for top notch goregrind (and let's face it, who isn't?), look no further than this Polish trio. While musically they do tend to have the "wall of indecipherable noise" mentality that is commonplace in grindcore, the vocals are of the more familiar, standard death metal variety, as opposed to senseless shrieking and hollering. As such, they are a great gateway band for people who are curious about grindcore but might be turned off by the sheer chaotic madness of bands like Magrudergrind, Rotten Sound or Brutal Truth. The music is dense and there is definitely a lot going on at once, but it still has a solid structure that you can identify with rather easily, at least as far as grindcore goes. And obviously it's heavy, fast and brutal as all fuck, so what more could you want?

Skies Over Bethany- "O Come O Come Emmanuel"

I know what you're thinking. A devout Christian metalcore band doing a remake of a Christmas carol? Traitor! Hang him high! Alright look, we all have our guilty pleasures, and this is one of mine. As much as I love slam and grind and death and brutality, I'm still a sucker for a good melody from time to time, and these guys hit that particular soft spot of mine like a sledgehammer with this song. I don't listen to anything else by this band, but for whatever reason I really dig this one, minus the breakdowns. In their defense, a good friend of mine is friends with Skies Over Bethany and he insists that the clean singing isn't auto tuned, so that's the bassist's actual singing voice. Good job sir. Alright then, now that that's over, I promise that will be the first and last time SOB will ever be featured on this site.

Into Eternity- "Pain Through Breathing"

Now then, if we're going to be talking about bands with talented singers, as far as I'm concerned this band is the reigning authority on the matter. Let's see anyone else go from super high pitched, Manowar falsettos to growling to screaming and back to clean singing like Stu Block does. And what's more the rest of the band is very adept as well, creating their own signature style dubbed "progressive melodic death metal". I had the pleasure of seeing these guys open for Iced Earth a couple years back, and let me tell you, they tore the roof off that place. Unfortunately they haven't really been heard from since then, most likely due to lead guitarist Tim Roth becoming a father, but I'll keep eagerly awaiting their follow-up to their 2008 opus The Incurable Tragedy. Catchy melodies, well-written riffs, jazzy drums, shredding solos and nonstop energy sum up this Canadian quintet; they genuinely love what they do, and they're damn good at it.

Trans Siberian Orchestra- "Christmas Eve In Sarajevo"

Yeah, I had to. It just wouldn't be Christmas without the good old TSO. There's not much I can say about these guys that hasn't already been said, and this song is a timeless classic. It's incredibly emotional and powerful, meant to express the hardships and lament brought on by the war that raged throughout Bosnia in the early Nineties. Even on Christmas Eve, battles raged in the streets, gunshots and explosions shook homes, and more importantly the lives of everyone involved. This song attempts to capture that raw emotion, and in this writer's opinion does so beautifully. TSO regularly does tours every winter, and I have yet to see them personally, but I've heard it's something to behold. Future show review? Only time will tell.

Well, that's all for this week. Happy holidays everyone, let us know your holiday plans in the comments, and we'll see you all on Monday. Peace.


Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Oh shit, I forgot Travis Ryan had a side project

Bonus points if you can read Travis' shirt

This isn't exactly breaking news, but it's still worth mentioning. Those of you who are familiar with the deathgrind masters Cattle Decapitation should definitely take a few minutes to check out Travis Ryan's equally brutal side project Murder Construct. This top notch grind machine features the infamous Cattle D. vocalist, as well as members of highly esteemed death metal and grindcore bands like Impaled, Exhumed, Phobia, Bad Acid Trip, Intronaut and more, so basically if you're a grind fan your jeans should be tightening any second now. All the usual ingredients for a good deathgrind band (dissonant chords, frantic blasts, an anti-everything mentality, etc.) are on display, but Murder Construct also put their own unique spin on the music, adding atmosphere and the occasional elephant-marching groove to the equation. If you want to get an idea of what they sound like, the lineup pretty much speaks for itself; think Karma Bloody Karma-era Cattle D. meets Exhumed, then they decide to get really drunk and play grindcore. The production is organic but not muddy as with many other bands in their genre, so it sounds like you're sitting there watching them jam. And speaking of watching them jam, you can do just that with this video of them rehearsing their song "Control".

Murder Construct's debut self-titled EP is out now via Relapse Records, but if you're too cheap to get it Metalsucks is also streaming it in full over yonder. Since a lot of the members are currently busy with their main projects this band doesn't really do a whole lot of shows, but according to their Myspace (y'know, because anyone fucking uses Myspace anymore) they have a show scheduled in Los Angeles for March 4th, so if you live in the L.A. area you're a lucky, lucky fuck. Leave your thoughts in the comments, and stay tuned for the next installment of Slam Spotlight sometime this evening.


Monday, December 20, 2010

Show Review: Job For a Cowboy, Skeletonwitch, A Life Once Lost and Misery Index- December 17th in Philadelphia, PA

Last Friday, my good buddy and I made the trek up to the First Unitarian Church to catch the Philly stop on Job For a Cowboy's latest jaunt. Neither of us had ever been to the church before, but we had both seen JFAC in the past, so we were interested to see how everything would play out.

Trap Them was supposed to be the first band of the night, but they had to drop off the tour for reasons of their own, which was no skin off our noses. They're fairly lame anyway, and that just meant we got to see Misery Index that much sooner. While it seemed kind of unfair to have a band as accomplished and seasoned as MI play first, before all the younger bands, that didn't stop them from bringing the heavy. This marks the third time I've seen Misery Index, and thus the third time they've kicked their fair share of ass. When the grooves and blasts got going, they looked as furious as they sounded, plowing through songs like "The Carrion Call", "Traitors", "Conquistadores" and more with ease. A few people moshed, but for the most part the crowd stuck to the basic head banging and horn throwing. When they wrapped up, they invited anyone who was willing to help them break down their equipment, and this allowed yours truly to meet and chat with their drummer, one Adam Jarvis, who incidentally is a very nice fellow. Good on ya, sir.

Next up was A Life Once Lost, the one band on the bill that I knew would attract the dancers, and lo and behold I was right. I discreetly made my way to the back of the venue for these guys, and sure enough, as soon as the mandatory "What the fuck is up, we're A Life Once Lost, let's fucking do this shit" sounded, about three or four kids started hyping up by hopping around like kangaroos. As expected, their performance was energetic due to the relative simplicity of the music, and the only moshing that happened was the same handful of dancers doing their thing. However, no fights broke out, and as far as metalcore goes ALOL isn't that bad, plus they played the one song I knew/wanted to hear, so it wasn't that bad. I give them a solid six out of ten.

Alright, so now that we'd gotten the breakdowns out of our system, the next band on the bill was the complete opposite, brimming with solos and nostalgic thrash riffs. I had no sooner worked my way up to the front of the stage when Skeletonwitch started off with a bang, and I immediately got sucked into a small but dense and enthusiastic pit that just didn't seem to end. Needless to say, the crowd response for this band was extremely warm, and rightfully so. These guys are a perfect throwback to the glory days of metal, combining all the best elements of thrash and melodic black metal. It's all about beer, headbanging and Satan-worshipping for Skeletonwitch, and there was plenty of all three (which was ironic, seeing as the venue is literally a church basement). Good moshing, a few stage divers, shredding solos and enough windmilling hair to make anyone dizzy; these things are all in a day's work for Skeletonwitch. Bravo gentlemen, bravo.

Last but certainly not least, after taking their sweet time setting up and soundchecking, Job For a Cowboy dove headlong into their set and didn't look back once. Now I must admit, I don't listen to JFAC much on CD, but they are a whole different monster on stage. Despite a dismal performance at the 2008 Mayhem Festival, I have seen this band three times now, and they have since proven themselves to be one of the most commanding live bands I've seen in years. Although there were a number of hardcore kids present throughout their set, there wasn't a single flailing arm or spin kick, and the pits, stage dives and crowd surfing were nonstop. For whatever reason there was a fill-in for guitarist Bobby Thompson, and bassist Brent Riggs was completely absent. Fortunately this didn't really affect their sound or performance at all, although it was very difficult to hear Mr. Not-Bobby-Thompson's leads over everything else at times. Regardless, they powered through their set nicely, playing gems like "To Detonate and Exterminate", "Unfurling a Darkened Gospel", "Knee Deep", "Bearing the Serpent's Lamb", "Entombment of a Machine" (complete with everyone screaming like an idiot and loving it, including me), and closing with "Embedded". Incomplete lineup notwithstanding, it was a very solid, commendable performance. This particular tour is pretty much over and done with, but if you do get the opportunity in the future to see Job For a Cowboy I highly recommend you do so, I know I certainly will.

All in all this one is definitely going down in the books as a good show. From making new friends, watching said new friends get really drunk and proceed to buy and don Skeletonwitch booty shorts, laughing about throwing change into the pit for A Life Once Lost just to see what would happen, meeting various members of Misery Index, Skeletonwitch and Job For a Cowboy, and giving JFAC drummer Jon "The Charn" Rice money as a donation for weed (I made him very happy), I think it's safe to say we had a blast, and I can't wait for the next one.

-The Baby Killer

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Cerebral Bore finally got signed!

Cereal Bobz...?

You read that right folks, the crazy Scottish (and one Dutch) bastards in Cerebral Bore have just inked a worldwide deal with extreme metal powerhouse Earache Records, and I can't think of a band that deserves it more. They will join the ranks of bands like Anal Cunt, The Berzerker, Decapitated, Evile, Deicide, Carcass, Hate Eternal, Vader and many, many more, and hopefully this means they'll finally be able to get their asses to America for a proper tour. Back in November we showed you the video for "The Bald Cadaver", and to celebrate CB's epic win, here's another track from their debut full length Maniacal Miscreation, called "24 Year Party Dungeon". Read the lyrics if you're looking for a good laugh to go along with the sheer brutality.

Excuse me while I go gather my melted face up off the ground. Give us your thoughts on this happy occasion in the comments, and stay tuned for more rebellion.


Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Shit Hardcore Kids Wish They Could Play: Episode 8

Before we get this started, I just want to publicly thank Mosh Rebellion for publicly thanking me for running the site while he was off getting shit on by life, I'm confident that he will come out victorious and stronger and more invigorated than ever. And also, dedicated MR follower skatex2xdestroy put it perfectly, fuck you Person B. If we catch you be prepared for a world of hurt. Now, on to the metal.

It's a well known fact that lightning makes everything badass, even Dying Fetus

Chances are most of you guys probably already know this next band, as well as the subsequent video, but that doesn't make it any less awesome. I'm talking of course about the death metal bulldozer from Annapolis, Maryland known as Dying Fetus. These dudes have been crushing skulls for almost twenty years now, and in that time they've continuously matured, both musically and lyrically. When they started out they were your typical blood, guts and dead babies band, but since then they've moved on to more intelligent, thought provoking subjects, like corruption, politics and deception. Basically they have a grindcore mentality when it comes to lyrics, while constantly honing and perfecting their signature crushing grooves and unrelentingly savage riffs. So, in the spirit of backstabbing and betrayal, this next song, from their fantastic 2009 album Descend Into Depravity, is dedicated to Person B, because "Your Treachery Will Die With You".

Descend Into Depravity and the rest of Dying Fetus' discography is available through Relapse Records, and if you don't already have it, then get your head out of your ass and go get it. Like right now, stop reading this article and go, dammit! For the rest of you, leave your thoughts/comments or any suggestions for bands you want to see featured here in the comments, and stay tuned for more brutality than you can shake a stick at.

Peace out cub scout
-The Muthafuckin' Baby Killer

Update: Where the Fuck Have I Been?!

Hello readers, its me, moshrebellion... remember? The guy who created this site? It's been a few weeks since I handed the reigns over to the Baby Killer and I must say, he's done a great job. The dude can write, and clearly has a passion for great music, so I would like to personally and publicly congratulate him on keeping the site up an running.

Now, some of the more attentive readers may have I realized I haven't posted something in awhile, and I'd like to share a little bit of what's been going on. I can't tell you the details of my situation, but I can tell you it's an extremely personal issue that has been greatly affecting my life for the worse. Some people reading may know what's been going on (hint: BK) and I encourage anyone who knows exactly what happened to refrain from sharing any information, as it will be deleted immediately.

So now that you know I've actually been occupied for the past couple weeks and haven't been merely playing Halo: Reach (though I did, not gonna lie), I'm going to offer you guys one piece of advice. I implore you to follow it, as it may be the most important information I can share with you.

Be careful who you trust. Not everyone who is your friend will be your friend when your ass is on the line. In fact, they may turn out to be your worst enemies.

I'm sure you've heard this many times before, but I cannot stress how important it is to withhold and of your personal secrets from people who you have not known for a long time or trust completely. I speak from personal experience. Something serious happened between me and Person A. Person B was a mutual friend between me and Person A, so I went to Person B for advice. I had previously shared personal information with Person B about my psychology and history, so I thought he would understand and help myself and Person A reconcile.

Instead, Person B sold me out. Person B stabbed me in the fucking back, and despite everything I had told him, like how much this situation was affecting me, how depressed I had become, how I couldn't sleep at nights, how my grades were slipping, etc. he egged on Person A to take our situation to authorities. Oh, and this is after I paid for Person B to go to a concert. On my birthday.

To me, Person B is scum. Person B is the best example I can think of to represent the evil that lies within humanity. He is more meaningless than the smegma of an uncircumcised baby. He is more pathetic than an old man slowly dying of cancer. If I ever see Person B in my life again I will ask him why he did what he did, and proceed to spit in his face. If I'm smoking at the time it will be hard to not force the rest of my cigarette down his esophagus.

And if you are reading this Person B I hope you realized how much you've ruined my life. I hope someone sells you out so you can feel what it's like to be convicted something you never did. I hope you're innocent, and I hope everyone thinks you're guilty so you know what it feels like. I hope you run out of those pills you so desperately cling to get sleep and maintain a sense of normality, and I hope reality crashes around you, cause it sure as fuck did for me.

You are trash and I hope you rot.

So yeah, that's where I've been. The situation is not completely resolved yet and will not be for some time now, and I still have a final to take, so don't expect many posts from me in the near future, however I will do my best. Running this site helps me forget that people like Person B exists, so thank you for reading and spread the words to your friends. The Mosh Rebellion has begun, but has been a bit delayed, but rest assured, you will see bigger, better efforts from us in the future, and you won't wanna miss it.

Keep the faith brothers, and show the Baby Killer some love.

Also, COMMENT! We know you're reading!

- Moshrebellion

Winds of Plague may suck, but at least they have a good sense of humor

"I just want to be taken seriously!" ... ... I'm sorry, what?

I'm still baffled as to why people make such a big hooplah about Winds of Plague. Just because you have keyboards and MIDI orchestration doesn't make you black metal, and just because you occasionally wear Behemoth shirts doesn't make you not a bunch of deathcore posers. They have even gone so far as to insist in interviews that they don't consider themselves deathcore at all, but I find that hard to swallow for the following reasons: they play excessive amounts of breakdowns (with gang chants I might add), they all wear flat brimmed hats and basketball shorts, they tour exclusively with other deathcore/metalcore bands, and oh yeah, THEY PLAY LOTS AND LOTS OF SHITTY BREAKDOWNS.

But all that aside, WOP just released a silly video via Metalsucks to promote their upcoming two-day Xmas show, and while the lineup is impressively unimpressive, the video itself is actually quite entertaining. Take a look, and while you're at it, listen to the song that starts around the 2:30 mark and tell me that's not deathcore.

Christmas with Winds of Plague? Thanks but no thanks, if my Christmas is going to be metal I'll stick with the good old Trans Siberian Orchestra. Speaking of funny holiday videos, if you haven't seen it yet here's Corey Taylor's new-ish Christmas music video to help you wash the scene off you from that last video. As always, leave your comments in the, well, comments section. Take care.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Reader's Choice: Soreption

Yet another awesome Swedish band, who'd have thunk it

A couple weeks ago, fellow metalhead and MR follower YuRmOm666 told us we should check out the Swedish death metal band Soreption, and it turned out to be a wise decision. The songwriting and musicianship are nothing short of superb, though not pretentious and wank-prone like a lot of modern tech death bands. In fact, labeling Soreption as tech death isn't even entirely accurate, because they've just got too much of a steady groove. The riffs and beats are insanely catchy, the solos are very well composed, and the vocal patterns are highly syncopated, but there aren't too many tempo or time signature changes, so while the composition is excellent, it doesn't get exhausting. If you don't find yourself bobbing your head along to this song, then I know of a few highly qualified psychologists that you should definitely have a chat with. From their debut full length Deterioration of Minds, this is "By Venom Entitled".

I swear I must have listened to that song like four times while typing this up. Anyhow, this Reader's Choice thing is something that we'd very much like to continue doing, so keep sending us bands you think we should showcase here. After all, we only know so many bands, we'll run out eventually without your help. Send us your suggestions in the comments section, and we'll definitely get around to checking them out. YouTube links would be appreciated, or MySpace if you want, even though we all know they've pretty much gone to shit as of late, but regardless, keep 'em coming, we want nothing more than to give back to the fans.

R.I.P. Chuck Schuldiner

Man, December sucks for metal. Less than a week after Dimebag's death, it's once again time to bow our heads and remember another fallen hero in metal: the one and only Chuck Schuldiner. On this day nine years ago, the Death frontman succumbed to pneumonia, brought on by his weakened state from the chemotherapy he underwent for his brain cancer. Though he is often credited as the unofficial father of death metal, Schuldiner was always very modest, insisting that he didn't deserve the title, and that modesty was what made him such a good role model for his peers. If we all follow his example, the future of metal will be very bright. Evil Chuck may be dead, but his legacy literally lives on in just about all of extreme metal today. Without him we wouldn't have any of this, so just keep that mind, because by doing so you're giving him all the honor and respect that a modest person like him could ask for. Tell us your favorite Death songs, albums, or memories of shows you may have seen them play in the comments, and raise your horns in his memory with this live clip of Death performing their classic song "Crystal Mountain". Rest in peace Chuck, you won't be forgotten anytime soon.

Friday, December 10, 2010

End of the week: what are you guys listening to?

Another week of blogging is in the books at MR, and I feel pretty good about it. Before we settle into our weekend routine of TV, porn and... uhhh... TV, let's look back on what we got done.

- We found out that even Scott Pilgrim likes grindcore
- We laughed at emo kids (twice, actually)
- We pondered the retirement of metal legends Judas Priest
- We announced one tour that looks pretty cool, and one that doesn't
- We mourned on the six year anniversary of the death of Dimebag Darrell
- We announced the new Children of Bodom album
- Slam Spotlight showcased videos for Condemned and Ingested, and Dimebag Darrell was further honored in a special episode of Shit Hardcore Kids Wish They Could Play.

Not bad for a week's work, eh? Now it's your turn. Tell us what you've been listening to in the comments below. Any ideas for bands that should be featured on here? Agree/disagree with anything said in the articles? Let us hear it, we're always happy to hear from anyone and everyone. Last week, reader YuRmOm666 sold us on the Swedish band Soreption, who will be featured on Mosh Rebellion sometime next week, and we encourage you all to do the same. We can't do this on our own folks; let your voices be heard, you're the reason we started this whole thing. Have a great weekend everyone.

Slam Spotlight Part 7

You know what they say about guys with big hands...

Since this is the next to last post of the week, I figured we should end things with a band that could honestly be featured in both this column and Shit Hardcore Kids Wish They Could Play. If you haven't heard of Manchester, UK gore fiends Ingested, then boy are you in for a treat.

I have heard people accuse Ingested of being trendy, and in turn I accused them of being mentally retarded. Unless of course I missed the memo that being trendy means having insanely fast and precise drumming that I still can't believe isn't played by a drum machine, playing chunky riffs when they're not slamming like pros and writing lyrics like "Regurgitate your own guts, blood and shit from anal cuts" and "Suffocate in anal vomit" (yeah, they like to talk about poop a lot). Yesterday's silly sex education video was trendy. Ingested, good people, is anything but. See for yourself with this song from their 2009 debut full length Surpassing the Boundaries of Human Suffering, entitled "Copremesis" (which is also a poop reference).

If that's trendy, then I will literally eat my own face. Surpassing the Boundaries of Human Suffering is out now via Siege of Amida and Candlelight Records, and the whole album is this freakin' good. Definitely add it to your library if and when you get the opportunity. If you have any other cool bands that you think are worth fapping over and should be included in Slam Spotlight, let us know in the comments section. Until then, stay brutal amigos.

-The Baby Killer

New Children of Bodom album!

Well isn't this a pleasant surprise. According to Metalsucks, Children of Bodom's new album Relentless Reckless Forever is set to release in the US on March 8th via Universal Music and Spinefarm Records. I've been a fan of Bodom for some time now, but I'll confess, recently I'd almost forgotten about them. I mean let's face it, Follow the Reaper and Hatebreeder are classics, and while their last couple of albums were pretty good, they just didn't quite live up to the monumental standards they had set for themselves. Still, that doesn't change the fact that they're a very talented band, and even if this new album isn't Hatebreeder 2 I'm sure it'll still be worth a listen or twelve. C'mon, it's fucking Bodom. Check out the teaser trailer for the video for the single "Was It Worth It" here, and leave your thoughts and/or concerns about the upcoming album or Children of Bodom in general in the comments below.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Video You (Probably) Won't Hate Most of the Day

Before we do anything, I feel obligated to warn you guys now that while the following video is hilarious, it does pretty much glorify screamo, like for reals. If you don't want to hear annoying screechy vocals over annoying breakdowns played by annoying scene kids wearing annoyingly cartoony band shirts for bands that are probably very annoying, don't watch this video. Now, with that being said, the lyrics and video itself are extremely entertaining. The video in question is I Set My Friends On Fire's tongue-in-cheek take on the concept of a sex education video, and while I literally want to punch every member of the band just from looking at their stupid faces, I can't deny that I had many lawlz throughout the entire thing, and hopefully you will too. Enjoy.

I'm not entirely certain whether or not this band takes themselves seriously, so there is the possibility that this whole joke video was just that: a joke. Either way it's pretty damn funny. Now I'm sure that after that ordeal you feel like you need to take a shower to wash all the scene off you, so here's Dying Fetus to make it feel all better. You're welcome.

Leave your thoughts in the comments. Stay tuned for more soon.

Avoid this tour at all costs!


Up until now, all the tours and shows we've put up on this blog have been awesome and we highly recommended going to, but today Metal Injection announced the dates and lineup for Whitechapel's next North American tour, and this one is the polar opposite of every other tour we've put up. The tour includes them, The Acacia Strain, Veil of Maya, Chelsea Grin and I Declare War, and it's going all the way across the country plus a couple dates in Canada all throughout February and March. Now don't get me wrong, I actually really like Whitechapel, and to a lesser extent Veil of Maya and I Declare War, and the progenitor of this blog is a self-proclaimed fan of The Acacia Strain. Lineup-wise, I don't really have too big of an issue. The problem is that this tour is absolutely, beyond a shadow of a doubt, one hundred percent guaranteed to attract droves of hardcore kids and dancers at every single stop. These kids will swarm to these shows like locusts, and if you don't want to spend literally the entire night either slouching in the back or constantly fighting the dancers off of you, I strongly suggest you sit this one out. As such I'm not going to put the tour dates up, but if you really want to go then click the link in the beginning of the paragraph, they're there somewhere. You're a big boy/girl, you can figure it out.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Shit Hardcore Kids Wish They Could Play: Episode 7- The Pantera Edition

In the spirit of Dime Day, today's installment in this series is a Pantera classic, guaranteed to incite a frenzied circle pit anytime, anywhere. Pantera literally needs no introduction; everyone is already familiar with Dime's chainsaw guitar tone, Vinnie Paul's pounding grooves, Rex's thundering bass and Phil Anselmo's larynx-shredding yet oddly melodic vocal style. As such, I won't waste any more time describing how awesome they are, because if you know anything about metal, chances are you already know this very well. From their multi-platinum 1992 album Vulgar Display of Power, we give you the timeless classic "Fucking Hostile". Getcha fucking pull!

Man, that shit will never get old. The night is still young, so everyone knock back a Black Tooth Grin and roll a fatty for our fallen brother, it's exactly what he would have wanted. Be good to each other.

Light it up!
-The Baby Killer

R.I.P. Dimebag Darrell

I'll do the best I can to keep this short and sweet. As many of you know, six years ago today, one of the greatest metal guitarists of all time was suddenly and tragically taken from this world. "Dimebag" Darrell Lance Abbott was shot and killed on stage performing with Damageplan at the Alrosa Villa in Columbus, Ohio on this day in 2004, along with Damageplan's head of security Jeff "Mayhem" Thompson, Alrosa employee Erin Halk, and an audience member named Nathan Bray, who was killed after he jumped on stage to try to give aid to Dime and Mayhem. The sadness that this event still brings to me is beyond words, and I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like for the family and friends of all the victims. However, this grief shouldn't weigh us down and dampen our spirits, but instead strengthen us and bring us all closer together. Dimebag may be dead in body, but as long as his loyal fans continue to sing his praise and pass his legacy on, his spirit will never die. Our hearts go out to everyone who lost someone that night, and our horns go up to him. Rest in peace Dime, we love you.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Slam Spotlight Part 6

You guys remember Cephalotripsy, right? Remember how I said the vocalist and drummer are in another really cool slam band? Well, uhhh... this is that band.

Condemned are everything you would expect from a band that's basically Cephalotripsy with two different guitarists. They have all the slams, puking gutturals and gory imagery of their sister band, but where these guys set themselves apart is they also have legitimate riffs. Cephalotripsy is pretty much all slam all the time, but Condemned's songwriting process actually puts the two guitarists to use. Throughout the album the songs switch sporadically between slow, chugging slams and breakneck speed blast beats and tremolo picking, all with a liberal application of pinch harmonics (for all you gee-tar players out there). This next video is from the band's 2007 full length Desecrate the Vile, and this song is particularly enjoyable because it has guest vocals from three other very talented vocalists, namely Levi Fuselier from Disgorge, Shawn Whitaker from Insidious Decrepancy/Viral Load and Sam Townsley from Parasitic, making for a huge, steaming pile of awesome. This little number is called "Chapter of Defilement".

Desecrate the Vile is out now via Unique Leader Records, yet another solid underground death metal label. Condemned are also currently in studio recording their sophomore album in between the occasional gig or two, so be sure to keep an eye out for that in the near future, I'm sure I'll make a big stink about it here when it comes out. That's all for tonight, see you guys and gals tomorrow.

Fare thee well
-The Baby Killer


Speaking of tours, another band that's been around for a good while has announced a North American tour for the spring of 2011: Sepultura. While I personally think these guys took a page out of Metallica's book and jumped the shark a long time ago, it doesn't change the fact that Sepultura's early work laid the foundation for just about all extreme metal, and that's gotta count for something. Plus a few of the bands they're touring with are really cool too, so there's that. The main support slot for this tour is being filled by Belphegor for the first half, then Nevermore is taking over after that. Both of these bands are awesome (if for completely different reasons), so no matter when this tour comes to your neck of the woods there will be a solid next-to-last band. The dates and lineup for this tour, which also includes Hate, Neuraxis and Bonded By Blood, are as follows, provided via Metal Injection:

With Angra:
01/13 Anaheim, CA – House Of Blues
01/14 Hollywood, CA – House Of Blues
With Belphegor, Hate, Keep Of Kalessin, Neuraxis and Bonded By Blood:
04/18 Toronto, ON – The Opera House
04/19 Quebec City, QC – Imperial de Quebec
04/20 Montreal, QC – Club Soda
04/22 Worcester, MA – The Palladium
04/23 Sayreville, NJ – Starland Ballroom
04/24 Philadelphia, PA – The Trocadero
04/25 New York, NY – The Gramercy Theatre
04/26 Charlotte, NC – Tremont Music Hall
04/27 Orlando, FL – The Club At Firestone
04/28 Ft. Lauderdale, FL – Culture Room
04/29 Atlanta, GA – The Masquerade
05/01 Tyler, TX – Clicks
05/02 Houston, TX – Scout Bar
05/03 Dallas, TX – Trees
05/05 Lubbock, TX – Jake’s
05/06 Albuquerque, NM – Sunshine Theater
05/07 Tempe, AZ – The Clubhouse (feat. D.R.I.)
05/08 Tucson, AZ – Club DV8 (feat. D.R.I.)
05/09 San Diego, CA – House Of Blues
05/10 Reno, NV – The Knitting Factory
05/11 San Francisco, CA – The Grand Ballroom At Regency Center
05/12 Portland, OR – Hawthorne Theater
05/13 Seattle, WA – El Corazon
05/14 Spokane, WA – The Knitting Factory
05/16 Englewood, CO – Gothic Theater
05/18 St. Paul, MN – Station 4
05/19 Chicago, IL – Reggies Rock Club
05/20 Detroit, MI – Blondie’s
05/21 Rochester, NY – Montage Music Hall
05/22 Cleveland, OH – Peadbody’s
With Nevermore, Hate, Keep Of Kalessin, Neuraxis and Bonded By Blood:
05/23 Louisville, KY – Expo Five
05/24 Milwaukee, WI – The Rave
05/26 Winnipeg, MB – The Zoo
05/27 Regina, SK – The Exchange
05/28 Calgary, AB – Dickens
05/29 Edmonton, AB – Starlite Room
05/31 Vancouver, BC – Rickshaw Theater

And there you go, get your tickets if the tour's coming to your town. For better or worse, I don't foresee any dancers within a square mile of any of these shows, so there's that.

Judas Priest are retiring(?)

Even the gay guy is more manly and awesome than you

Well, this certainly comes as a surprise. After approximately forty years, one of the most iconic metal bands of all time are apparently calling it quits. According to the perpetually awesome dudes at Metalsucks, the band announced that their next tour is scheduled to be their last before officially retiring as a band. Now, I'll confess, since I'm a youngster I really don't listen to Judas Priest, like ever, but whether you listen to them or not there's no denying that they are one of the most legendary, long lasting heavy metal bands of all time, and the thought of them not being around anymore is something that's really hard to wrap your head around. Let's face it, Dio's dead (RIP), Black Sabbath haven't released anything since I was about five, and Ozzy is still around but hasn't released any material that even comes close to what he did back in his heyday. Priest, on the other hand, kept the train rolling, releasing new albums that were just as well-received as their old ones and continually touring, making damn sure nobody forgot about them. Even if you don't listen to them, the fact is they've always been around, so from that perspective it may even be more surprising to the younger generation than to the older fans. Either way, here's some cool live footage of their timeless classic "Breaking the Law" circa 2004.

Many people are questioning whether or not Judas Priest are actually serious about breaking up; after all, what better way to get people to come to your show than to tell them there won't be any more? This isn't an unreasonable argument, but whatever the case may be, once the dates for this supposed final tour are announced they will be put up here post-haste. And hey, if this whole thing does turn out to be a publicity stunt, what's the worst that could happen? Judas Priest will play more shows and record more CD's, oh darn.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Video(s) You Won't Hate Most of the Day

You hate trendy emo kids, right? I thought so, otherwise you probably wouldn't be reading this blog. Second question: you love funny misheard death metal lyrics videos, right? Well then boy howdy, do I have a video for you.

It's no secret that a lot of us here at Mosh Rebellion like to poke fun at Waking the Cadaver from time to time. I mean let's face it, they try really hard, but they just suck. A lot. They have all the right ingredients for a good slam band: their band name/logo is cool, they have all the gory song titles and lyrics, they play br00tal slamz and gravity blasts, but somewhere between conception and execution, the whole band just falls flat on their faces. And yet for some reason, a lot of dumbasses can't seem to get enough of them. Granted most of the said dumbasses are the aforementioned trendy emo kids, so that may be saying something. Anyhow, here's a misheard lyrics video for "Chased Through the Woods By a Rapist" that's all about how emo kids are fags.

Did anybody else see some scrawny little scene chick wearing a Cattle Decapitation shirt somewhere in there? The nerve! But anyway, I'm pretty sure the reason this video is so damn funny is because it's very accurate. Like I keep saying, if nothing else the scene/hardcore kids are a constant source of entertainment. Mwah ha ha, you petty fools. Here's a couple more choice misheard lyrics videos for bands that don't suck at all.

Necrophagist- "Fermented Offal Discharge"

Cannibal Corpse- "Hammer Smashed Face"

There's grindcore in Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World!!!

As of the past week or so, Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World has quickly become my favorite movie, possibly of all time. Or at least for right now. This movie has everything; the laughs are endless, the whole movie feels like somebody threw an old retro video game and a comic book into a blender and it came out as a movie, there's this (you're welcome), and best of all, in one part there's fucking grindcore!

Okay fine, so it's not actual grindcore like Napalm Death, Magrudergrind or Brutal Truth, but still, the song's less than five seconds long, and the lyrics (all two of them) convey an undeniable sense of frustration, anger and sadness. Y'know, in case the title didn't give that away. So what we have, ladies and germs, is grindcore, if only by definition. But hey, a rose by any other name, right? You can't say it isn't funny.

Friday, December 3, 2010

End of the Week: What Are You Guys Listening To?

It's been quite a week here at Mosh Rebellion. The awesome dude who runs this little shindig has had a lot on his plate lately, so he asked me, The Baby Killer, to take the wheel until he gets everything sorted out, and I basically tried to make up for lost time from the week before, and I gotta say I couldn't be happier about it. Here's a basic summary of what we did:

-King of Those Who Know and moi reviewed two sick shows (Nile and Cannibal Corpse, respectively)
-I also showed you guys and gals the sheer awesomeness of Pathology, Viraemia, Short Bus Pile Up and Anaal Nathrakh
-I debuted a new series "Video You Won't Hate Most of the Day", showing you that hating hardcore kids can be fun too

So anyhow, we all know what I've been listening to lately, because that's exactly what I write my columns about here, so instead of just putting a few more random YouTube videos up, I'm encouraging you all to tell us in the comments section what you've been listening to. If you have any suggestions for bands that should be featured on here, or just want to fap over how awesome your favorite band is, by all means let us know. We're not here just to listen to ourselves talk, we welcome any and all feedback by you, the readers. Have a great weekend everyone, stay brutal not br00tal.

Shit Hardcore Kids Wish They Could Play: Episode 6

We call this the "Shut up, it's not Anal" face

 Since this is the last SHKWTCP post for the week, I had no choice but to bring out the big guns. We've seen plenty of incredibly talented bands so far, and there are countless more to come, but none of the past or future bands on the list are quite like Birminham, England natives Anaal Nathrakh.

Perfectly blending the best elements of black metal, grindcore, industrial and death metal, this UK-based duo is, in this writer's opinion, quite possibly the most genuinely evil band in existence. Anaal Nathrakh  are essentially the physical embodiment of misanthropy; you can literally feel their unrelenting hatred for humanity in everything from Mick Kenney's ominous chord progressions to vocalist Dave Hunt's throat-tearing shrieks and mournful clean singing. Basically, if evil could be made into music, it would be Anaal Nathrakh. Now, I know I said that I don't like a lot of black metal, but these guys aren't your typical black metal band, they're everything that's good about the genre and much more, because they put their own flair on it as opposed to doing everything Burzum has already done a thousand times and nothing else. See for yourself and check out the title track from the band's widely acclaimed 2009 opus In the Constellation of the Black Widow.

God, that scream at 1:17 still gives me the chills every time. Like I said, pure, unadulterated hatred harnessed and put into music. Constellation is available now via Candlelight Records, as is the rest of their discography, so be sure to pick it up. As per usual with many black metal artists, Anaal Nathrakh are very elusive and don't regularly play shows (they've only been to America once to my knowledge, as part of the Maryland Deathfest a few years ago), but if you happen to be in the London area they're playing a show with Mayhem on Saturday, December 18th. If you have the opportunity to see them definitely don't pass it up, it's a rarer opportunity than you might think, and all the live videos they have suggest that an Anaal Nathrakh show isn't something to sniff at. Have a good weekend everyone, I'll see you all on Monday.

Horns up
-The Baby Killer

Video You Won't Hate Most of the Day (aka "This Is Fucking Hilarious")

We talk about how much we hate hardcore kids a lot in this blog; in fact, it was pretty much the catalyst for the whole thing. Many hours have been spent laughing at their expense, and talking about what we would do/what has been done to them if they started shit at a legit metal show, but now we have our greatest weapon against them yet: an instructional video on how to capture and subdue them! Not only is this video hilarious, but it's also fairly accurate in calling out the various stereotypes, albeit in a very tongue-in-cheek manner. Take a look.

If that didn't make you laugh then you're either A) a hardcore kid, or 2) a communist. And if you're III) a communist hardcore kid, then we should all run for our lives because you're an evil, evil person. Now I'll admit I kinda like Born of Osiris' newer stuff, but you can't deny that they couldn't have picked a better soundtrack for this video, which is another reason why it's so hilarious. The only thing they could have done to make it better would be to have a bunch of kids gang up on that guy with the blue shirt at the end instead of just shoving him into a pole, because we all know that nine times out of ten that's exactly what happens. Oh well, we're still better than you, na na na boo boo.

Slam Spotlight Part 5

Statistical fact: only 25% of the people in this picture actually saw the camera

Now that we've had this series going for a little while, I think it's high time I gave some props to a band that I actually sorta-kinda-somewhat know personally (translation: I saw them at a show in Delaware about a year ago and chatted with them and they're awesome and I stalk them on Facebook because I'm cool like that). Without these guys, I would never have gotten into slam, and I owe them big time for it, so everybody give it up for a band that is very near and dear to me: Fredericksburg, Virginia's own Short Bus Pile Up.

While these guys may not necessarily bring anything game-changing to the genre, they do have a very natural, organic sound, and all of the individual members are locked in with each other perfectly, resulting in insanely catchy riffs/slams and musicianship tighter than a camel's asshole in a sandstorm. Basically, they're nothing new, but they are damn good at what they do. I could drawl on about them until the cows come home, but I'll attempt to retain some of my machismo and just let you all see for yourselves. From their crushing new full length Repulsive Display of Human Upholstery, this is a little number called "Stench of Her Burning Flesh".

Although they've been active for the better part of five years now, Short Bus just recently penned a deal with Sevared Records, and for those of you who don't know, this is a very good thing, because they're pretty much the Metal Blade of all things slam and/or brutal death.  These gentlemen should be proud to be on such a prestigious label, and subsequently Sevared should also be proud to have a very solid addition to their already stellar roster. If you liked what you heard here and are in their neck of the woods, Short Bus Pile Up is playing a show with Waking the Cadaver and Dysentery (another very good band that will definitely be featured in this column in the near future) on January 14th. Yeah I know, Waking the Cadaver is boring as hell, but their touring bassist is actually a good buddy of mine, and honestly I can think of way worse bands to open for, so get over there and show them some love. And if you can't make it, at least pick up the CD.

Hail Satan and stuff
-The Baby Killer

Thursday, December 2, 2010

I made a mistake. Whoopsies

Remember a long, long time ago in my article on Pathology when I said their next tour was in the summer with Enthroned? Well, turns out I was only partially correct; that tour's still happening, but I thought the whole debacle with replacing their guitarist and vocalist meant they weren't going to be able to tour with Deicide in February/March. As luck would have it, they're still on board, and I'm perfectly happy to stand corrected. And regardless of whether or not Pathology is playing, it's fucking DEICIDE, you should all go anyway. I know I'm excited as hell. The tour dates with them, Belphegor, Blackguard, Neuraxis and Pathology (durr) are as follows:

Feb. 15 – Atlanta, GA – The Masquerade
Feb. 16 – Charlotte, NC – Tremont Music Hall
Feb. 17 – Raleigh, NC – Volume 11
Feb. 18 – Philadelphia, PA – The Trocadero
Feb. 19 – Rochester, NY – Montage Music Hall
Feb. 20 – Providence, RI – Club Hell
Feb. 21 – New York, NY – The Gramercy Theatre
Feb. 22 – Quebec City, QUE – Imperial de Quebec
Feb. 23 – Montreal, QUE – Cafe Campus
Feb. 24 – London, ONT – Music Hall
Feb. 25 – Toronto, ONT – Opera House
Feb. 26 – Chicago, IL – Reggie Rock Club
Feb. 27 – Detroit, MI – Blondie’s
Feb. 28 – Louisville, KY – Headliner’s Music Hall
Mar. 01 – Tulsa, OK – Marquee
Mar. 02 – Denver, CO – Bluebird Theater
Mar. 04 – Seattle, WA – El Corazon
Mar. 05 – Portland, OR – Hawthorne Theatre
Mar. 07 – Las Vegas, NV – Cheyenne Saloon
Mar. 08 – Los Angeles, CA – Key Club
Mar. 09 – San Diego, CA – Brick By Brick
Mar. 10 – Tempe, AZ – Clubhouse

Get your tickets if this tour is coming anywhere near you, and expect a review from me shortly after the Philly date, because you better believe I'm gonna be there (unless someone else beats me to it, which is highly unlikely since both the NYC and Seattle dates are after me). Stay brutes.


Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Shit Hardcore Kids Wish They Could Play: Episode 5

Remember way back when, in the very first episode of Shit Hardcore Kids Wish They Could Play, where I talked about how even more awesome Brain Drill would be if they didn't have the tendency to slack off in the songwriting area in favor of overindulging their noodling? Well, this next band is pretty much exactly what I had in mind when I said that.

Phoenix, Arizona tech-wizards Viraemia could arguably be perceived as a Brain Drill clone, and this is justifiable. Both bands base their songwriting around brain-frying technicality played at Ludicrous Speed, but Viraemia set themselves apart in one major way: their songs have definitive song structure, a surprisingly easy to follow verse-chorus-verse-chorus formula that allows them to be virtuosic but still have individual, instantly recognizable songs. There's plenty of gravity blasts and riffs that will make your fingers cramp just listening to them, but the chaos is ultimately very controlled. From their self-titled 2009 EP, here's "Cancrum Oris".

And there you have it. Viraemia have been hinting at a full length for some time now, but as of right now there are no further developments. But rest assured, when it does finally happen, heads will be turned. Check out their Myspace for more info and show dates if you happen to be in their general area. Take care everyone, tune in tomorrow for more tr00 shit.

P.S. For all of you who got the Spaceballs reference in the second paragraph, you're welcome.


Video You Won't Hate Most of the Day (aka "This Is Also Pretty Funny")

This video may be dated, but it never gets old.  (See what I did there?) At long last, there is a hilarious tongue-in-cheek video on hardcore dancing and emo fags, and in this particular case it's in the form of a mock instructional video. This video's four years old and it still cracks me up every time. If you're looking for a good laugh, take a few minutes out of your day and have a look-see.
Hit the nail right on the head, right? The description says this video is the first in a series of five, but sadly that may also be a joke because I haven't found any others since. If anyone else knows if there are any continuations, or other funny vids like this, or even just your own entertaining stories involving hardcore kids/dancing, feel free to share them in the comments below, we're always up for some good lawlz.