What Are Your Favorite Metal Workout Songs?

Once upon a time a baby was brought into this world, and he was fat. The baby steadily grew older, but he still remained fat. The boy's fatness was never too big of a deal to him until he entered high school, when he realized that being fat got in the way of him getting chicks, yet he was too lazy to do anything about it and decided to play the Legend of Zelda over and over again instead of making an honest effort to get in shape. Then, the boy went to college, and his fatness truly began to interfere with his relationships with women, and the boy decided "fuck this I'm tired of being fat," and decided to get in shape.

The boy in question is me. I have decided once and for all to rid myself of my exploding gut in recent weeks and have made an honest effort to get in shape. There is an exercise bike which I ride in my house almost every day now, and recently I have taking a liking to listening to music when I ride. Whilst looking through my New Stuff playlist I came upon Impending Doom's most recent album, There Will Be Violence. Upon listening to that album now I realize the musicianship is nothing to fawn over, and its nothing but slightly less generic deathcore, but goddamn if I didn't have the most intense workout that day listening to that album.

So, I decided to make a playlist of songs to workout to, took it for a few test runs and finalized it. The list in question contains many deathcore songs, not because I necessarily love the bands, but because the whole tough guy vocals on top of breakdowns are great for getting the blood pumping as much as I hate to admit it. The list is as follows:

Abominable Putridity - Sphacelated Nerves
The Acacia Strain - Beast
The Acacia Strain - The Impaler
After the Burial - My Frailty
After the Burial - Bread Crumbs and White Stones
All Shall Perish - When Life Meant More...
All Shall Perish - Black Gold Reign
All Shall Perish - Never... Again
All Shall Perish - Gagged, Bound, Shelved, and Forgotten
All Shall Perish - Herding the Brainwashed
All Shall Perish - Wage Slaves
All Shall Perish - There is no Business to be Done on a Dead Planet
All Shall Perish - The True Beast
At the Gates - Suicide Nation
August Burns Red - Your Little Suburbia is in Ruins
Behemoth - Slaves Shall Serve
Behemoth - Conquer All
Between the Buried and Me - (B) The Decade of Statues
The Black Dahlia Murder - Christ Deformed
The Black Dahlia Murder - I Will Return
The Black Dahlia Murder - What a Horrible Night to Have a Curse
The Black Dahlia Murder - Deathmask Divine
The Black Dahlia Murder - Climactic Degradation
The Black Dahlia Murder - Unhallowed
Born of Osiris - Elimination
Born of Osiris - Exist
Born of Osiris - Empires Erased
Born of Osiris - Open Arms to Damnation
Born of Osiris - Abstract Art
Born of Osiris - Brace Legs
Born of Osiris - Bow Down
Chimaira - Secrets of the Dead
The Contortionist - Vessel
Converge - Dark Horse
Converge - Cutter
Despised Icon - MVP
Despised Icon - All for Nothing
Despised Icon - Entre Le Bien Et Le Mal

Drewsif Stalin's Musical Endeavors - Warface

Equilibrium - Blut Im Auge

Fleshgod Apocalypse - In Honour of Reason 

Hatebreed - Doomsayer

Impending Doom - Orphans

Impending Doom - Peace Illusion

Impending Doom - The Great Fear

Impending Doom - Walking Through Fire

Impending Doom - Children of Wrath

Job For A Cowboy - Entombment of a Machine

Job For A Cowboy - Knee Deep

Job For A Cowboy - Embedded

Job For A Cowboy - Unfurling a Darkened Gospel

Krisiun - Combustion Inferno

Krisiun - Bleeding Offers

Lamb of God - Ruin

Lamb of God - Laid to Rest

Lamb of God - Now You've Got Something to Die For

Lamb of God - The Faded Line

Lamb of God - One Gun

Lamb of God - Black Label

Lamb of God - Walk With Me in Hell

Lamb of God - Redneck

Lamb of God - Beating on Death's Door

Lamb of God - Blacken the Cursed Sun

Lamb of God - In Your Words

Lamb of God - Set to Fail

Lamb of God - Reclamation 

Meshuggah - Rational Gaze

Meshuggah - Bleed

Metallica -  Whiplash

Metallica -  Hit the Lights

Metallica -  Disposable Heroes

Metallica -  Ride the Lightning

Pantera - Domination

Pantera - Revolution is My Name

Pantera - Fucking Hostile

Pantera - Rise

Periphery - The Walk

Periphery - Totala Mad

Periphery - Zyglrox

Rage Against the Machine - Bulls on Parade

Rage Against the Machine - Killing in the Name

Returning We Hear the Larks - II: The First to Fall

Rings of Saturn - Abducted

Rings of Saturn - Embryonic Anomaly

Slayer - Skeleton Christ

Suffocation - Abominations Reborn

Suicide Silence - Wasted

Veil of Maya - Dark Passenger

Veil of Maya - Namaste

Whitechapel - Vicer Exciser

Whitechapel - Possession

Wolfmother - Joker and the Thief

There you have it. Put that bad boy on shuffle and you're sure to get a nice sweat going. I'm curious however, what music do you guys listen to when you workout? I'm always looking for new additions to the playlist and I'm generally interested in your guys' opinions, so comment below and I'll try to fit some of your songs into my playlist. I hope this comes in handy for any other fat metalheads aspiring to be slightly less fat metalheads.

Slam Spotlight Part 9

Backwards caps, crossed arms and a Fallen shirt... not a great sales pitch

Alrighty then, I've been saving this next band for a while now, but I believe the time is right. This band is another personal favorite of mine, without whom I would never have gotten into this genre. Ladies and dudes, all the way from Grand Rapids, Michigan, I am proud to present Gutted Out.

This band is very talented all around, but I believe what really sets them apart is their drumming, or more accurately their drum programming. Yes, they do use a drum machine, and it's fairly obvious just from listening to it, but rather than just using it as an overpriced metronome like many other bands, Gutted Out really uses it to further their sound. There are a lot of experimental, syncopated beats and fills that most people wouldn't think to try, and they end up working quite well. This was something I noticed right away when I had the good fortune to see them live a couple years ago, and coincidentally that show also marked my first time seeing Short Bus Pile Up (who made my second Best Albums of 2010 list). That one show piqued my interest in the entire slam genre, and since then I've never looked back. It is my hope that they will do the same for you now, so without further ado, from their incredibly underrated EP Amongst the Rotted, this is "Maggot Ridden Bowels".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jpmYStEsbak
 
To my extreme sadness, Gutted Out has since then disbanded, and it's a damn shame because they really had something going. I truly think that if given the opportunity, they really could have made a name for themselves in the slam arena. Their music was well-written and their live show was an absolute blast, but I guess some things are just too good to be true. Well, at least we still have the memories, and we'll always have this one EP, which you should definitely pick up. Hopefully the other members will go on to do something else, then who knows. Ahh, to dream.... Oh well, leave your comments, and stay brutal everyone.

-The Baby Killer

Video You Won't Hate Most of the Day

It should be fairly obvious at this point that I'm slightly gay for Devourment; after all, my pseudonym is The Baby Killer. As such, I thought we could kick off the week with a live video of the band playing the very song that is my namesake at the 2009 Mountains of Death Festival in Switzerland. Now bear in mind, I picked this video for two specific reasons. First of all, it shows how ungodly Devourment is live, and second, while the bassist is busy fiddling with his equipment to get it working, frontman Mike Majewski talks to the crowd and expresses his own distaste for hardcore dancing. So to recap: Devourment is brutal as fuck, they're amazing live, and they hate hardcore kids too. Sold! Get to watchin'.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJk0CpY2A2c

Don't worry, my face hurt after the first time too. Devourment's discography is available through Relapse Records, and if you don't already own it, then give yourself a good smack upside the head and get it. Give us a comment or two, and stay tuned for more later.

-BK

End of the Week: Happy Fucking New Year

Alrighty then, I think we did pretty good for ourselves this week seeing as we, y'know, did stuff at all. For those of you who are just now joining us, first of all you have terrible timing, and second, here's a rundown of what we got done.

- We showed you the new self-titled Dimmu Borgir video
- We finally got around to doing new episodes of Slam Spotlight and Shit Hardcore Kids Wish They Could Play
- We announced upcoming releases from Wormrot, Maruta and Gorgasm
- We met the only cool HxC dancer there is
- We introduced you to Dr. Satan, a guy who went on MTV to show that he just wants to be loved too
- Unbeknownst to me, mosh rebellion himself recapped the year in metal at the same time that I was doing something. Thanks for the heads-up dude, good thing I looked. Kidding, love you ^_^
- And finally, The Baby Killer did a second Best of 2010 list, 'cause that's how I roll.

Wow, I think that may actually be the most we've ever done in one week. We need girlfriends. But anyway, as always leave us some love in the comments, and have a brutal weekend. See you bitches and/or hoes on Monday.

The Baby Killer's Other Albums That Were Pretty Good of 2010

See that? I stuck to my New Year's resolution. For now...

Anywho, when I looked back at my best of 2010 list, I realized that there was a lot of stuff left out of it, either because it was getting late and I was tired or I just plain forgot about them, so I think I'll close out the week with a continuation of sorts. The following albums were also really damn good and are definitely worth picking up.

Fleshwrought- Dementia/Dyslexia

Tech death fans rejoice, this album is nothing short of a masterpiece. It's a collaboration between Navene Koperweis (not to be confused with the girl from Avatar) of Animals As Leaders and Jonny Davy of Job For a Cowboy, and I gotta say, I have no idea how so much talent can come from two people. Actually, Navene plays all the instruments and Jonny just does the vocals, but it's still arguably his best work to date. If you want to get an idea of what it sounds like, first I would suggest you, I dunno, buy the album and listen to it, but for those of you who need to be wooed first, think The Faceless' first album but WAY heavier and beefy-sounding (which is fitting since Navene played for The Faceless for a while), and obviously with Jonny Davy doing vocals. The music is superbly written and manages to be experimental as all hell, yet undeniably catchy. I'll go on record and say that Mr. Koperweis is one of the best metal musicians of our generation, and his passion for what he does shines through brilliantly on Dementia/Dyslexia. Get it, and get it fast, but I must warn you, the outro to the song "Weeping Hallucinations" will make you feel like you just did a lot of drugs, even if you didn't. And if you did do drugs, for the love of Christ save yourself and turn it off now!

Dimmu Borgir- Abrahadabra

Yes, I'm well aware that this album has been getting a lot of flak lately, so much so that Dimmu was actually named the Worst Band of 2010 in Terrorizer Magazine's reader's poll, but fuck you, it's my best of list, I'll put whatever I damn well please on it, and I happened to like this album, thank you very little. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I love a good powerful melody, and what better way to do just that than to record with an entire orchestra? And not that MIDI shit either (I'm looking at you, Winds of Plague), but the real thing. Despite no longer having the two members that made them great, Dimmu managed to put out an album that flat-out defines the phrase "symphonic black metal" by perfectly combining the two genres. They do stumble occasionally (I try to just ignore Agnete Kjølsrud's curious screeches in the first half of "Gateways"), but for the most part the band and the orchestra compliment each other nicely, creating a truly epic sound that they haven't achieved since "Progenies of the Great Apocalypse" first gave us brain aneurysms. Not bad for a band that doesn't have a full-time drummer, bassist or keyboardist. Now they just need to bring Vortex back and everything will be right with the world.

Hour of Penance- Paradogma

The general atmosphere of this album can be accurately summed up in three words: blast... fucking... beats! The Italian quartet's latest offering doesn't slow down a bit for its entire duration, and I don't really have a problem with that, like at all. Machine gun drums, gnarly riffs (with occasional shredding), rapid fire vocals and crisp production are what make Paradogma a keeper. Believe me when I tell you folks, this is brutality incarnate. If you can find someone who isn't intimidated by such blasphemous gems as "The Woeful Eucharistry", "Thousands of Christs" and "Spiritual Ravishment", then I'd say you just found yourself a new friend. There's not much else I can say that wouldn't end up being redundant at this point, so just get the damn album and enjoy.

Fleshgod Apocalypse- Mafia

For everything you need to know about Fleshgod Apocalypse's new EP, see the above paragraph but sprinkle the songs with audio clips of classical music. 'Nuff said. Although to be honest I don't really know what the giant octopus has to do with anything, but whatever, it still looks scary.

Short Bus Pile Up- Repulsive Display of Human Upholstery

Last but certainly not least, you may remember these Virginia slamsters from when we featured them in Slam Spotlight a while ago, and they were put there for a very good, very simple reason: their new album is bad-fucking-ass. The only way I can describe it is that the band just got everything right, from the guitar tone to the snare tone to Tyler Sharpes' vocal tone; any tone you can think of, they thought of. And the music ain't too shabby either, with plenty of catchy grooves, brutal slams and just the right amount of new songs and re-recordings to please fans both old and new. If you're looking to get your mosh on, put on songs like "Ball-Peen Beating", "Stench of Her Burning Flesh" and "Gagging On Dick" and see if they don't make you wanna grab someone smaller than you and throw them just for the fuck of it.

Alright, now we can put 2010 behind us for good. It was a pretty rad year for metal, but the forecast for 2011 is looking pretty damn bright as well, so here's to the future. Tell us what your favorite metal memories of 2010 were, or what you're looking forward to the most this year, in the comments below.

TGIF
-BK (gaaahhhh too many acronyms!!!)

Mosh Rebellion's 2010 Recap

My Best Albums of 2010 list is still in progress, but I feel it would be nice to look back on some of the more memorable moments of 2010. It was a great year for metal and at the same time an awful year for metal in certain regards, and the following a list of the events I feel sum up the year the best.

Best Event of the Year

What could be better than the founding of Mosh Rebellion? This is my most significant event of the past year, right along with meeting the Baby Killer. It's about damn time someone made a place for people to congregate and plot the demise of hardcore dancing, and I am proud to call my website home to the rebellion. The satisfaction you readers give us is untold, and we always love to read your emails and comments, so keep it up you guys! Spread the word, and the true rebellion can begin!

Worst Event of the Year

The death of Ronnie James Dio on May 16 was a deep blow to the metal community. The man was 67, and passed away way before his time on earth was up. I think its safe to say that Dio's death rocked the metal community about as much as Dimebag's, and since I was only in 7th grade when Dimebag died, I feel much more saddened by Dio's death than I ever did about Dimebag, may they both rest in peace. Dio's contribution to metal is untold in scope, and from what I have heard and seen he seemed like a fun loving and extremely nice individual. You know those horns you throw up when your favorite band plays your favorite song? Yeah, Dio was responsible for implementing that in his music, and metal fans picked up on it. Henceforth, Dio gave us a voice, and a way to express ourselves more than any other musician has.

Subsequently, his music was not bad either. Holy Diver, The Last in Line, his work with Heaven and Hell, the list goes on. His personality shined through his soaring and recognizable voice throughout all his works, and while his lyrics may have been cheesy, they were catchy as a motherfucker. I still remember in tenth grade when I found the words "Holy Diver" scrawled across my desk in spanish class. In response, I wrote the first line of the song, "you've been down too long in the midnight sea," and a day later I was greeted with "oh what's becoming of me," written under my addition. I was communicating with some random metalhead in my school who I had never met, and we were bonded through Dio's words.

May he rest in peace, and may we never forget what he has done for us.

Most Despicable Event of the Year

Look at the top left corner of this photo. I want all you readers out there to do that!

The Rose Funeral Uno Incident. For those who do not know what happened you can read about it here, here, and here. Basically, some kids starting playing Uno doing during Rose Funeral's set and they got jumped during and after the show. The fact that you can't handle criticism and decide to wail on someone in the audience when they don't like your music is revolting enough, but one of the kids was 17... a minor. Rose Funeral beat up a minor because he didn't like their music. Fucking despicable. Granted, what the kids were doing was a bit douchey, but the vocalist could have easily brought it up and made a joke about it and continued with their set, but instead they decided to start shit with a guy who isn't legally old enough to consent to sex in some states. And it doesn't help that their music sucks massive fucking nuts to begin with. I encourage anyone who sees Rose Funeral from this point on to play Uno during their set. They can never forget about this.

Scumbags.

Most Significant Event Towards the Removal of Hardcore Dancing

We're just some guys foolin' around! Who knows what craaaaazy thing we'll do next?

The Despised Icon farewell tour. I love Despised Icon, as they made arguably some of the most talented deathcore music around, but it's fantastic to see them leave the scene, especially after the high note that was Day of Mourning. They had a very wide fan base, so it was a bit of a shock when they announced they would be breaking up after one final tour. Many deathcore enthusiasts were very sad about this, and even though I love their music, I could not be more elated. The removal of arguably the biggest deathcore band in the scene reduces the popularity and exposure of such music to the masses, henceforth reducing the number of potential fans the genre can make. The more intelligent diehard deathcore fans (if there is such a thing) may have realized that their genre might be entering its downfall and that they should get involved with music that bass players can cover with more than one hand.

To sum up: less deathcore bands = less deathcore music and shows = less hardcore dancing. Let's hope more people follow Despised Icon's trend.

Most Anticipated Album of 2011 

New Protest the Hero. Good god I hope they can follow up Fortress.

Least Anticipated Album of 2011 

New Rose Funeral.

Most Anticipated Album of 2011 pt. II

 New Rose Funeral. We will have so much to make fun of when that shit comes out!

Look for possibly more superlatives of the previous year in the near future, and my best of 2010 list hopefully sometime before February.

New Gorgasm album!

That's hot

After a five-year hiatus, the underground brutal death champions Gorgasm are finally ready to release a new album. The new album, entitled Orgy of Murder, will be the Indiana natives' first release in eight years (not counting the demo they released in 2006). The album is set to drop on February 25th via Brutal Bands Records, and last night Sevared Records announced that they will be releasing five hundred vinyl copies of the album the following month. Obviously a lot has changed for Gorgasm in their absence; the only remaining original member is lead guitarist/frontman Tom Leski, but they are confident that the new material is some of the best they've ever written, and that long time fans won't be disappointed. And I must say, after hearing the new song they released to promote the album, I agree heartily. Here you go boys and girls, this is "Exhibit of Repugnance".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kW3sjXU0W_A

Hot damn, I can't wait. Expect a full review when this bad boy is made available to the general public, and in the meantime be sure to pick up the rest of their shit from Brutal Bands and Unique Leader Records. Shoot us a comment about Gorgasm in the comments (derp), and stay tuned for a new episode of Slam Spotlight later in the evening (hopefully).

-The Baby Killer