Friday, January 14, 2011

Atreyu are calling it quits (for now)!!!

Sorry, couldn't resist

This is very, very good news, ladies and gentlemen. Confirmed by both Metalsucks and Metal Injection, Atreyu have taken a page out of System of a Down's book and decided to go on an indefinite hiatus after more than a decade of being one of the shittiest, whiniest, testosterone-deficient bands around, and it seems like everyone who isn't this guy couldn't be happier. In his statement (aka a terribly-written Tweet), Alex Whatever-His-Last-Name-Is-Who-Cares said that the band is unfortunately not breaking up, but simply taking a long break to focus on various other projects which will probably suck hard and gain lots of unwarranted popularity in Atreyu's absence. One can only hope that at some point someone from the band gets head from a girl in a Goatwhore shirt or something, that way Atreyu can stay gone, and we'll permanently have one less scene-core band to worry about. Now if we can just do that to, say, Bring Me the Horizon, Attack Attack and Underoath, we'll pretty much eliminate the majority of the emo kids' power source, and the rest will just be a mop-up for us. Alright it's settled, we have a plan of attack. In the meantime, here's a cool Immolation song to help you forget that we just spent a whole article talking about Atreyu. Can you hear us? Death to Jesus!

Leave your hatred of all things Atreyu (and any obligatory Luck Dragon jokes) in the comments, and stay tuned for one more pleasant surprise before we call it a week.


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